Relationships And Ageing

To be successful in your relationships, you must be open, honest, willing to make time for each other, and open to uncomfortable discussions about getting older while sharing your emotions

One thing I’ve always said is “getting older is getting sexier every day.” What I mean by this is that getting older comes with a certain maturity and life experience that you don’t have when you’re younger and this life experience also means that we are much wiser than we were when we were in our 20s.

Relationships are a big part of our life and the right relationship and partnership empowers us to be a better person every day. So many women are afraid of getting older and we spend so much time and energy, on dyeing our hair, on using anti-ageing products. We spend hours on our nails and getting our skin care. Similarly, men are shamed for their lack of hair or their height or the income they make. When are we human beings going to realise that success on the inside is much more important than success on the outside.

Coming back to getting older and ageing, this is a natural part of life. The more we deny our authentic selves, the more disempowered we feel, and when we are not being honest with ourselves, it’s hard to be honest with our partners, and in our everyday relationships. The thing to remember is that businesses make profit out of the commercialisation of human emotions. The more insecurity we feel about our bodies the more money, time and energy we spend on changing what we don’t like about ourselves and our appearances. However, when we embrace our real selves it can be very empowering.

Here are a few steps to better your relationship with age:

Know yourself - We are frequently told that it is critical to “know thyself.” Although this advice may sound cliché, knowing who we are makes a difference in our romantic relationships. People who feel more confident in their identity are more likely to be committed to and satisfied in their romantic relationships. People who acknowledge having a more distinct self-concept also say that their relationships are closer and more satisfying and committed. Couples are more apt to nurture the relationship because it is better. We as human beings are also more likely to devote time and effort to our relationships when we are more certain of who we are.

Acceptance - Our interactions and experiences shape and mould us into the people we become. We will continue to evolve and grow as individuals and as a couple for the rest of our lives if and when we are willing and open to it. There is no age or time limit on learning, growth and personal development. The key to a long-lasting relationship is for both partners to acknowledge that they are not the same people they were 10, 20, or 30 years ago. Couples who are able to accept this are better able to accept the changes in their partner and in themselves and to treat them with kindness throughout the process. Ageing with a loving partner necessitates acceptance of physical changes, this could include inability to do what we used to do, and even mild to severe cognitive deficiencies that occur as we age. Dealing with declining health issues or showing love when people are at their least loveable requires a great deal of patience. But that is precisely when they require love the most. When we accept ourselves we also make room to accept others.

Unveiling - You do not have to share everything with everyone, but you will discover some things in yourself as you go deeper. Unveiling will help you connect with the parts of yourself that are sometimes hard to face and to examine. You may find insecurity, jealousy, unhealthy relationship patterns, or addiction, to name a few things that sometimes lurk under the surface. Unveiling yourself means you do not live in discontent anymore. Taking this step means you have chosen to embrace those parts of yourself, and have unapologetically committed to love them into health. Authenticity starts from self-knowledge and then self-acceptance.

Release - In today’s society and in keeping with the rise in human consciousness, people are always looking for new ways to release stress, anxiety, and pain. Releasing can mean letting go of the past. You do not have to have deep, serious conversations about your relationship on a daily basis, but you must share your feelings (not just your thoughts) about what is going on in your life. For example, saying you were “late for a meeting” only provides the most basic information. However, expressing your “embarrassment about being late for a meeting” helps you connect with the person you’re speaking with. Releasing also includes ending a relationship that is no longer helping you feel sexy or brilliant.

To be successful in your relationships, you must be open, honest, willing to make time for each other, and open to uncomfortable discussions about getting older while sharing your emotions.